Waiting.

I believe that the worst part of being a professional musician is having to audition. It's like having job interviews all the time. You're nervous. You worry about what to wear. Will I remember the words? Are they going to let me finish? Will they hear everything I've prepared? Is my leg going to shake again this time?

Okay...I guess you can figure out now that auditioning is not my favorite thing. I get about 75% of my work through a recommendation or word of mouth now, but I still have to go out and do auditions. As I've gotten more experienced, I am less traumatized by this process and I now perform better, but there's one thing that hasn't gotten easier...

...waiting for a result.

A few weeks ago, I auditioned for something and I felt as though I did the best possible job I could have done. I felt really good about it for the first time I can remember. I had to do a second audition for the same gig, which I suppose I was okay with. I did well then too, although I didn't feel as strong as I did the previous time. Now, all I have to do is wait. Waiting can be really crazy-making.

If the gig means a lot to you, you imagine yourself with the gig and you get all excited. You start dreaming of outfits you would wear (if you can choose your own) and you start shopping online. You contemplate how you're going to pay for your new piece of clothing for this fabulous gig. (I admit to having picked out this and this.)

Then, you imagine someone else with the gig and you start to second guess yourself. You start to ask yourself questions that don't even apply yet! "Why didn't I get chosen? What's wrong with my voice? Is it a looks thing? Who am I competing with even? Did that girl that sang before me do better?"


The truth is you're actually competing (usually) with yourself. Learning to stop comparing your own voice to others' is one of the most difficult parts of being a singer.

It's enough to make anyone a little insane. I am still waiting. I am dangerously close to asking when I should expect a result announcement, but part of me still wants to hold on to the possibility. The fantasy that until I've gotten a rejection, I've still possibly got the gig. I guess the fantasy has to end sometime though, right?

I am back, baby!!!

Hey Ladies! I have been neglecting my blog while I've been recovering. I am happy to report I am doing much better these days. At my sickest, I was down to a scary 83lbs! It was the worst ever! Now, I'm back up above 90 again and I'm feeling more like myself. My tummy is still a little temperamental (not sure if it's psychosomatic or something is actually up), but I'm learning to live with it.

It seems like if you get sick and you get better, everything in your life suddenly improves! I have begun to get very busy with gigs this season. It's quite exciting! I even have two concerts on the same day, which means a day full of happy! I can't complain! So in honor of healing and gigging, I have changed up the blog template and bought a cute little domain for her. StylishSoprano.com

I'll mostly post about the same things here and there will be cute pictures of clothes too, as soon as I have something cute to photograph on. I must confess, I've been shopping significantly less and I've fallen off the bandwagon a little, but I'm back full-force now. Have an awesome day ladies!

(BTW, please check out my podcast if you haven't before! I promise you'll enjoy the week's episode with Bryson Lang! Just click play on the BlogTalkRadio sidebar widget)